In Love With Life!

LIFE ain't easy..
PEOPLE ain't perfect..
But I'm totally in love with both..

Dare to be Different

I know Sarawakians look different in a way,
I mean compared to West Malaysians.
People can actually differentiate Sarawakians easily when we are among West Malaysians.

But, don't I even look like one?


The most common question that hit me after I entered UTP is :

"Are you from Thailand?"


Then the rest come like :

"Are you from overseas?"
"Do you speak Tagalog?"
"Which part of Thailand are you from?"
"When are you going back to Thailand?"
didn't even bother to ask me whether I'm from Thailand 1st
"So, are you from Myanmar or Thailand?"
~the list goes on~

My answer:
"Er..I'm from Sarawak..You are from??"


PART 1
A few times I was hit by the questions:
"Are you really Chinese?"
"Are you Malay?"

My part 1 answer:
"Okay..I'm mix. Chinese and Bidayuh..."


PART 2
Then they ask,
"What is Bidayuh?"

My part 2 answer:
"Bidayuh is a tribe in Sarawak...bla,bla,bla"
~starting to explain bout the multi racial in Sarawak~



Some Chinese even speak Malay to me,
without realizing I can speak Chinese.
When I reply in Chinese,
then you can see their face expressions change.
(I remembered those moments well, especially when I go shopping)


Despite all the questions that hit me unexpectedly,
I am proud to be different,
and of cause I won't wanna do plastic surgery to make me look~
more like a Chinese or Bidayuh..
It's the mixture of both that makes me look different.
We are living in a multi racial country.
Love and respect other races just like how you respect your own.


Peace! :)

First & Last

EVERYONE HAS THEIR FIRSTS:

FIRST SCHOOL: bodhi kindergarden

FIRST CELL PHONE: nokia

FIRST FUNERAL: my grandma's

FIRST PET: rabbit

FIRST BIG TRIP: KL

FIRST FIGHT: KL

FIRST CELEBRITY CRUSH: shane (westlife)

FIRST TIME OUT OF THE COUNTRY?: indon border

FIRST JOB: sales assistant

FIRST MYSPACE FRIEND: no myspace

EVERYONE HAS THEIR LASTS:

LAST PERSON YOU HUGGED: dear roomy, clare

LAST CAR RIDE: to Mc D

LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: forgotten

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED: Bangkok Dangerous

LAST FOOD YOU ATE: Cococrunch

LAST ITEM BOUGHT: Belt

LAST SHIRT WORN: Pyjamas

LAST PHONE CALL: Clare

LAST TEXT MESSAGE: dear bro

LAST KISS: forgotten

LAST THING YOU TOUCHED: my lappy

LAST FUNERAL: my grandma's

LAST TIME AT THE MALL: last Saturday

LAST TIME YOU WERE EXCITED FOR SOMETHING: forgotten bout my assignment

LAST PERSON YOU SAW: clare

LAST THING YOU DRANK: milk

LAST PERSON THAT BROKE YOUR HEART : a friend

LAST TIME YOU WERE REALLY HONESTLY HAPPY?: i am always happy :)

love is patient & kind

“Love is patient; love is kind
and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;
never selfish, not quick to take offense.
There is nothing love cannot face;
there is no limit to its faith,
its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things
that last forever: faith, hope, and love;
but the greatest of them all is love.”

(1 Corinthians 13:4)


I am afraid to fall cause I am afraid you will never catch me.
I am scared to like cause I am scared you do not like me.
I am afraid to care cause I am scared you will care more about her.
I am scared to love cause it hurts loving you if you never really cared.

But love is patient and kind.
I will forever believe in God.
Believing that love is forever long sufferings and long waiting...

Thanks for reminding me that love is patient,
and how I should use my past as a guidance to my future.



~xoxo_piggyhead to piggybutt~

CSS Simpang Pulai waterfall outing

Went to Simpang Pulai waterfall today
after church with the Christian Student Society (CSS) gang.
We had BBQ and lots of fun just hanging around and playing games.
Here is a slide show of pictures we took.
Who ever having more pictures of the outing,
can inform me yea..
We can share the pictures here.. :)

the moment came

as i had expected, this moment will come one day. the moment where i will argue with him again because he had not got over it. it was tragic, like a superb debate where we had to come out with proves of our points. we argued about his girls and my guys. he said the girl he called "dear" and "hubby" , sending kisses and telling them how much he misses and loves them are not his girlfriends. he said, i never see through his heart - i really never did, that was why i wanted the break. he said i am a playgirl, having guys messaging me non stop. he did not understand me too. i had left my old life as a player. i am now single - means no boyfriend, so how can he possibly say i am a player. yet, if i am a player, i will be having 4 to 5 guys as my boyfriends by now. i am not trying to be proud here. how can i possibly be proud if those guys only want me for dirty-minded reasons? and, i do not call my guy friends hubby or sweet stuffs like that. since the break up, i had not told any guys i love who-so-ever. but he did, not sure it was before or after we broke up. it was terrible. he did not understand that we are actually distance relatives or friends now, but he treated me like an enemy of his. he thought his ex who he never saw for real was everything, but they broke up too. she told me she never did really loved him, but again, he blamed me saying i cannot be trusted. i am not the judge of humans. he thought he was always everything in the girls eyes. he said his ex never cheated behind him. but he do not know the actual truth, cause they never met. he said i was wrong, when he can watch over me 24/7 compared to his we-never-met ex. i hate guys who twist things up just to save their face. his apology message was a lie. i no longer believe in the powerful words of "i love u" from him. he told it too often, not only to me, but his other girls. he find girls just to be occupied, what is that suppose to mean? i was lost in the moment of rights, anger, revenge, truths, lies... tried hard to defend that i am no longer a player. if people are to browse through his messages and mails, they can obviously judge who is the real player. he said his messages are his privacy. he was trying to defend himself, saving his dignity. but it was not working on me. why should he be angry if he did nothing wrong. he did something wrong, that was why he was mad at me. there was nothing that bothers me when we argued, i believed i was right and i had nothing to fear. i believe one day God will show me the way, i will pray hard and believe. the moment had ended. it will end forever if he can get over everything and for goodness sake, stop asking why i left him. i gave him the same logical answer all the time but he do not seemed to understand. get over it dude, i will never be yours. we are cousins, remember??

Thanks..

Thanks to him..
For making me realize..
That life is not all about relationships...
It is about the care and love towards each other..
No matter it is between our family, friends or opposite gender...

He may not be someone special..
He is just a friend..
Who I deeply fall for...

But I truly respect him..
For making me realize the difference between words and actions..
Of care and love..

Thanks...

Love my life

I love my life..
Even if he don't loves me..

喜歡上了，愛上了，就是了

能選擇要不要喜歡上一個人或愛 上一個人嗎？這個男孩太傻，為了一個不愛自己的人付出那麼多！....現在應該很少這種人嚕..若他就在你身邊的話..記得珍惜他..曾在女孩的記憶中， 有那麼一個人。「我現在喜歡的人，就是我前面的這位啦！」男孩大聲的說著，指著走在他前頭的女孩。「神經病！」女孩嘀咕著，快速走開那群跟著起鬨的人群， 只當男孩拿她開玩笑。直到某一天，女孩收到了一封信。『我是真的喜歡妳！我可以為妳做任何事，只要妳喜欢，我都會去做。一封信就這樣，沒有署名，短短幾句 話，但女孩卻知道是男孩寫的。『那你能現在跳到馬路中央嗎？ 』女孩在信紙背面寫上這句話，託人交給男孩。「我能！妳看著。」男孩看了內容，當著她的面衝進馬路中央。只聽見震聾欲耳的喇叭聲、刺耳的煞車聲、巨大的碰 撞聲，以及映入女孩眼簾倒在血泊中的男孩。「我真的能為妳做任何事．．．．．．」男孩的話救護車高亢的呼聲中，依舊清楚的傳入女孩耳中。「是你們家的女兒 要我們家的孩子衝進馬路中被車撞的！」「胡說！明明是你們家的兒子自己衝進去的！」「什麼胡說！他同學說的你們不是也聽見了嗎？我們家的孩子是看了你們女 兒的信才衝進去的！」「真的是這樣嗎？」女孩的母親回頭看著女孩。「嗯。」女孩點了頭，淚水也在她低下頭的瞬間，滴上了那張寫著男孩與她的字的信紙，似乎 也企圖抹殺掉發生的事實。「你看吧！你們要怎麼賠我兒子的人生！他再也不能打籃球了．．．．．．」男孩的母親歇斯底里的大喊，哭倒在醫院冷硬的地板上。 「這．．．．．．」女孩的父母無言。「我要你們的女兒陪著我的兒子，直到他再也不需要她的時候，這是你們女兒欠我們的！」男孩的父親說。「不行！她不愛你 兒子啊！你不能那麼自私！」女孩的母親不捨女孩受這種罪。「好，我會陪著他。」在眾人驚訝的目光中，女孩答應了。


-------------------------兩年後------------------------


在 公園的躺椅上，男孩和女孩靜靜的坐著，輕柔的風撫過他們疲憊的心。「為什麼喜歡我？」女孩開口了。「能選擇要不要喜歡上一個人或愛上一個人嗎？喜歡上了， 愛上了，就是了。」男孩淡淡的說。「如果有一天我有喜歡的人了，你會放我走嗎？」女孩說。「我從來沒有綁住過妳，是妳自己不放自己走的。」男孩說。沒有交 談了，只有風吹動落葉的颯颯聲。男孩說對了，兩年前在他醒來後，他就解除了約定，但女孩始終將自己綁在男孩身邊，她愧疚，因為她的一句玩笑話，毀了男孩的 夢，男孩再也不能打籃球了。-------------------------------------------------------然而故事 卻不會永遠都是好結局，女孩的心給了另一個人，沒有給肯為她付出一切的男孩。「你為什麼當初要聽我的話！你怎麼那麼笨！」女孩跪倒在地上哭泣。 「我．．．．．．只是愛妳。」男孩說，伸手想將女孩扶起。「我不要你的愛！」女孩甩開男孩的手。「你的愛太強烈，害慘了我，你知不知道啊！你知不知道 啊！」女孩歇斯底里的哭喊著。「我．．．．．．」男孩說不出話來。「為什麼是我！為什麼是我！你為什要愛上我！我討厭你這樣！我討厭！討厭！」女孩用盡所 有力氣大聲嘶吼，轉身跑了出去。女孩的愧疚太深，她沒辦法打開心結，她因為責任而留在男孩身邊，直到她喜歡上別人了，她再也不能忍受不能和喜歡的人在一起 的日子，所以她崩潰了，然而也傷了男孩的心。女孩使勁的跑，用力的跑，淚水模糊她的視線，心中的煩亂讓她沒看對她迎面駛來的卡車．．．．．．「小心！」伴 隨著警告，有人推開了她。熟悉的碰撞聲響起，再一次，女孩回頭看，再一次的看見倒在殷紅的血泊中。「我真的能為妳做任何事．．．．．．」男孩說，嘔出一口 血，昏了過去。「不要！」女孩受不了再一次的刺激，她尖叫，使盡所有力氣的尖叫。「太遲了，肋骨插進內臟，內出血止不住，沒救了。」「那麼年輕 就．．．．．．難道真的沒辦法了嗎？」醫院裡的人議論紛紛，句句傳入女孩的耳中，她的淚水決提，濕了她的襯衫。如果她當初能理智一點就不會發生了，如果男 孩不要愛上她就好了，她哭，哭的歇斯底里，因為這次男孩真的要離開她了，他現在只能等待死亡。「我想妳應該進去看他．．．．．．」男孩的父親說，他的悲痛 清楚的寫在臉上。「好．．．．．．」女孩語不成聲，她只能不停的流淚。女孩進了病房，見到男孩蒼白的臉，她淚水流的更兇。「不要哭．．．．．．」男孩心疼 的舉手擦拭女孩的淚。「你好傻．．．．．．」女孩哭個不停。「或許吧．．．．．．這個給妳．．．．．．」男孩張開緊握的手，一封沾了血的信。「這是最後一 封了，好好的看好嗎？」男孩說，眼角留下一滴淚。「好．．．．．．」女孩接下那封信，清澈的淚水滴在信封上，混著暗紅乾涸的血。「我真的能為妳做任何 事．．．．．．」這是男孩的最後一句話，他再也不能待在女孩身邊，他走了，女孩昏了過去。『給最愛的妳：愛上妳，多半是痛苦，我知道妳的心永遠不會交給 我，可是我還是好愛好愛妳．．．．．．當初如果知道我的行為會讓妳無法自由的飛，我不會去做。妳知道嗎？只要妳高興，我真的能為妳做任何事。我知道當妳看 這封信時，妳已經有喜歡的人了，放自己自由好嗎？

不要在強迫自己留在我身邊，我希望妳能活的快乐。
不要問我為什麼那麼傻。能選擇 要不要喜歡上一個人或愛上一個人嗎？喜歡上了，愛上了，就是了。我會一直守護著妳，因為妳是我最愛的人，我真的能為妳做任何事，不管過了多少年，我都不曾 改變。』女孩收起了信，她的淚水已經不再流下，男孩離開她已經五年了，五年的時光也讓她從一個年輕的女孩蛻變為成熟的女人。女孩的命，是男孩救的，但女孩 的心，自始自終都不曾落在男孩身上。『能選擇要不要喜歡上一個人或愛上一個人嗎？喜歡上了，愛上了，就是了。』

在蔚藍的天空裡，風裡似乎帶來男孩的低語。
女孩不能選擇，男孩也不能選擇，谁都不能選擇。

Do We Have Choice To Fall For A Person?

Do we have a choice if we fall in love into a person? This boy is too stupid, he sacrifised a lot because of a girl that doesnt love him at all!!!... Nowadays we can hardly seen this kind of people...If he/she is besides u, remember to appreciate.. In a girl's memory, there is this kind of boy exist in her life. " The person that I love now, is in front of me!" the boy shouted loudly to the girl that walk in front of him. "CRAZY!!" said the girl , and quickly walked away from the crowded place. She taught mayb that boy is kidding wiv him. One day,the girl received a letter. " I really like you. I can do everything for you. As long as you like, I will do it right away." She received this letter that is without written the name of sender. But refer to the speech, she knws the letter is written by that boy. " If then, can you jump to the middle of the road right now?" She replied this message bhind he letter and asked somebody to pass it to the boy. " Yes, I can. U wait n see." After the boy read taht letter, he straight away rush to the middle of the road in front of the girl. Only heard the sound of horn, braking, and a loud sound of crashing, and she saw that boy lied down on the road with full of blood. "I really can do anything for you......." The boy's speech in an ambulance was clear in the mind of the girl.



"Is yr daughter want my son run to the middle of the road and knocked down by the car!" "Bullshit!! Is your own son want to rush to the middle of the road." " What bullshit? Their classmate said that my son rush to the middle of the road after read the letter form yr daughter." "Is that true?!" The girl's mum asked her daughter. "Erm." The girl admitted and her tears falls. She really feel like erased this scene n really hope that this incident nvr happened before. " Now u see.. how r u going to compensate my son's life? He can't play basketball anymore...." The boy's mum cried and shoted and fainted on the floor of the hospital. "This....." The girl's parents have nth to talk. " I want yr daughter to take care of my son until he doesnt need her, that is yr daughter owes us." said the boy's dad. "No... she doent love yr son, you cannot be selfish. !!" The girl's mum is reluctant her daughter to live under this kind of situation. " Ok, I take care of him.." The girl promised in front of both parents.


....... .................................2 years later.......................................



The boy and the girl sat quietly on the chair of the garden. "Why do u like me?" The girl speaked. " Can we hav a choice if we fall in love into a person? Fall in love, that's it."

the boy said softly. " Let's say one day if I found a person that I love, would u let me go? " " I nvr stop u before, is you r de one who cant put down yrself. " said the boy. They ended the speech. The boy promised the girl that once he is recover , he will let the girl go and find her own happiness. But the girl cant even do it because of her feeling of guilty. Because of one joke, she ruined the boy's life and dream. The boy will never play basketball anymore...........However, the story do not have a happy ending.. The girl doesnt appreciate the sacrisfaction of the boy. "Why do you want to listen to me? Why r u so stupid?" The girl kneeled down n cried. " I.....just because of loving you." said the boy , holding her hands and help her 2 get up. "I dont wan your love!!!!". escaped frm the boy's hand. " Your love is too strong, u've ruined me.. do u understand? do u understand??!!!!" The girl cried loudly. "I'm......" the boy had nth 2 say. " Why is me?! Why is me?! Why you fall in love into me? I hate u like that... I hate..I hate.." The girl shouted loudly and ran away...The gulitiness of the girl is too deep, she accompany the boy is because of responsibility..until she fall in love into other guy..she cant stand anymo 2gether with the person that she doesnt love..However she hurts the boy. The girl run as fast as she could out to the road until she did nt realize a lorry in front of her ....... "Look out!!!" somebody pulled her. Again she heard the familiar sound of crash, when she turned over, again she saw a boy lied on the floor with full of blood. " I really can do everything for you......" the boy said softly , blood flowing out frm his mouth and fainted. "No.......!!!!!" The girl screamed loudly as loud as she can.. "It's too late.. the bone is broken and affect the heart.. there is no way to cured." " He's still very young.. there is no idea to save him? " the gossiping sound of nurses and doctors flew into her ears. The girl cried until her blouse is wet because of tears. Because this time the boy really left him, it means that he's dead. "I think u shud go in and see him..." said the boy's father, his sadness is all written on his face. "Ok.." said the girl. "Dont cry..." said the boy and using his hand to wipe of her tears. " U're stupid.." cried the girl. [ Mayb... this is for u..] the boy said and gave him a letter and said "this is the last one... read it ok?" ..." I really can do anything for u.." This is the last speech from the boy...and he left this world.

This is the content of the letter he write for the girl:

To my beloved:

Fall in love into you more than half of the time we r having sadness and pain. I know you will never accept my love for you. But I really really love you...... If I know this incident earlier that will cause you do not have a freedom to have a choice, then I probably will not do it. You know? As long as you are happy, I dont mind to do anything for you. I know when you read this letter your heard already have somebody, try to give yourself a freedom ok?

Don't try to force yrself to accept me and stay with me. One thing I hope is you can live happily. Don't ask me the reason why I'm stupid. Can we have a choice for wether we want to fall in love into a person ? Fall in love, that is already a fact. I will always protect you, because you are the person that I love. I really can do anything for you. No matter how many years, I will never change.

The girl kept the letter and he tears stop flowing. The boy had left her five years. The girl changed from a young girl into a matured girl today. The boy saved the girl's life. But unfortunately her heart will never pass it to the boy. Do we have a choice if fall in love into a person? When we fall in love, that is the fact.

Under the blue sky, the boy doesnt have a choice, the girl doesnt have a choice, anybody also do not have choice.

credits to Jonathan Sim

I know him, but I don't know him

we broke up, it was my choice.
he said he can't accept it, i was his everything.
he said he loved me the most, like what he did with his ex.
before the break up, we were rocky.
i dislike his attitude, he was very ego and self conscious.
he said he would change for me.
i did not believe him, i dislike his attitude too much.
that's when we broke up, i was happy with it.
after the break, i was happier than i was before.
he remained as a close friend.

i met people, guys who wanting to date me.
but i was not ready, my mindset had changed.
i was once a player, now no longer.
i remembered a friend who told me :
true love need not to be find, it will come itself when the time is right.
maybe he did not understand it, he dated not one but more girls.
perhaps before, during or after our break up.
after i found out, i was feeling lucky and happy we actually broke up.
he knew that i found out he is dating girls.
so he wrote me something, which i knew it was not true from his heart.

he said he is sorry because he is having not one, but two or more girlfriends.
he said he had not changed, he never did.
he said he never really love those girls,
he just wanted to be occupied.
he said he only love one girl, who i am sure she's not me.
most probably his ex, who i think got back to him after we broke up.
and lastly, he said he still loves me,
which i strongly believe is a lie.

he never knew what his ex told me,
she said she never really loved him.
he was blinded, thinking he was the most powerful.
thinking that he is so cool that girls swarm around him,
and getting girls one after another.
i knew how it feels, getting guys one after another.
but i am no longer that girl.
i am happy being single and having guys loving me as brothers and friends.
some tried to woo me, but God will lead the way.
i am now believing true love will come when the time is right.
and God will lead the way and give signs if the chosen one is mine.

he is no longer the person i knew before.
or i can say, i never even really know who he is.
how can he still say he love me,
when he is currently having two girlfriends or more?
to me, he is now barely a friend.
how can i ever love him again when i never even know him.
and i am trying hard to respect him.

dude, you know who you are.
i am very sure you read my blog.
having girlfriends isn't everything.
you said you got jealous seeing my messages coming non stop.
and you said you dated more than one girl to make yourself occupied.
you said you were lonely after we broke up.
what is actually in your mind?
you date girls just to stop your loneliness?
or just to have girls messages filled up in your inbox?

honestly, i am feeling very lucky.
lucky that i am no longer yours.
but it's your life, you decide.

i wonder if there is someone who is as happy as i am when they broke up.

曖昧 Ai Mei

By : Rainie Yang 楊丞琳

曖昧讓人受盡委屈
找不到相愛的證據
何時該前進　何時該放棄
連擁抱都沒有勇氣

只能陪你到這裡
畢竟有些事不可以
超過了友情　還不到愛情
遠方就要下雨的風景

到底該不該哭泣
想太多是我還是你
我很不服氣　也開始懷疑
眼前的人　是不是同一個真實的你

曖昧讓人受盡委屈
找不到相愛的證據
何時該前進　何時該放棄
連擁抱都沒有勇氣

曖昧讓人變得貪心
直到等待失去意義
無奈我和你　寫不出結局
放遺憾的美麗　停在這裡

Ambiguity makes people feel wronged
they can't find evidence of love
the right time to get closer, the right time to give up
Can't even bring up the courage to hug one another

I can only accompany you up to here
After all, there are some things that I cannot do
Surpassing friendship, not quite reaching love
It's about to rain in a faraway place

Should I cry?
Is it you or I who thinks too much?
I'm really not convinced and I start to suspect
Is the person in front of me really the same you?

Ambiguity makes people feel wronged
they can't find evidence of love
the right time to get closer, the right time to give up
Can't even bring up the courage to hug one another

Ambiguity makes people greedy
until waiting loses its meaning
I cannot bear the fact that we cannot write out an ending
Let the beauty of regret stop right here

我和你...
曖昧?

Life ^^

21.10.2008

Class started at 8AM today.
Woke up at 7AM, feeling drowsy.
Slept around 3AM cause I was studying Chemistry.
Will be having Chemistry test on 22/10..
Nothing much practically happened today.
Got back Physics Test 1 paper.
Was satisfied, well at least it was better than Chemistry & E Maths.
Feeling sleepy during most lectures, but still able to concentrate.
The end of the day was English tutorial.
Had much fun, writing letter to ourself.
Mr.Rosli, our tutor asked us to draw our own version of life line.
And write events happened in the past and vision of our future on the line.
He said he will post it as a letter in 20 years to come.
By that time, we will be around 38 years old.
Was a very interesting thing to do, wonder how my reaction will be.
Presented my life line in front of the class.
I told my birth date just like all other presenters.
Got a Happy Belated Birthday wish from Mr.Rosli.
And the whole class sang the birthday song to me.
Was kinda embarrassing, but thanks guys!
Went back to hostel straight after tutorial and studied chemistry.
Slept at 11PM, then woke up at 2AM to study again.
Now blogging and taking a short break.

All I wanna say is..
"I'm hungry!!"
I took dinner, 1 bun and Milo for supper and I am still hungry!!

God Is Love

Father in heaven, hear my prayer.
Keep me in your loving care.
Be my guide in what ever I do.
Bless those who love me too.

God will take you through hell,

just to take you to heaven.

Peace!!

Loving the moment...

I am loving the moment..
Where I get to love everyone..
And I get them loving me back..

I am loving the moment..
When I get people catching me..
Whenever I was about to fall..

I am loving the moment..
Where I get to see people smiling to me..
Realizing there are still peace around me..

I am loving the moment..
When people put hope on me..
Knowing I can still do something for them..

I am loving the moment..
When people say they want to hug me..
Showing I will always be there for them..

I am loving the moment..
Where people care about me..
Believing I will also care for them as much..

I am loving the moment..
When people want me to be beside them..
Knowing that I will always be there to support them..

I am loving the moment..
Where I realized it is late..
Sensing that I had lived through my life as I wanted to..

I am loving the moment..
God lead me to everyday..
Learning He still loves me and had always been beside me..

I am loving the moment..
Every moment in my life.....


From the bottom of my heart..
To everyone around me..
Thank you for be there for me..

When boredom caught me..

We both love stars..
If only you knew how much I wanted to catch some for you..

1. Who among your friends know the real you?
-none..im mysterious..

2. when was the last time you went out?
-yesterday (mc d ipoh..)

3. If you could kiss anyone who would it be?
-mum & dad

4. What song are you listening to?
-SHE : always on my mind

5. who does they remind you of?
-someone special to me

6. Last movie you watched?
-part 1 of A walk to remember

7. What is your favorite shirt?
-any tees

8. What did you do yesterday?
-wen to mc d was the latest agenda

9. Do you wear contacts or glasses?
-none

10. Do you trust your friends?
-mostly..

11. What annoys you?
-tests, assignments, lab reports, tutorials, sleepless nites..

12. Do you want multiple piercing?
-no!

13. Your favorite song in your player?
-SHE songs (current craze)

14. Last time you went to the mall?
-er..during kl trip.. (midvalley)

15. What was the last thing you ate?
-maggi mee (pity me)

16. Which of your friends would make the best room mate?
-clare is the only roommate i ever had..

17. last thing you bought for someone?
-mc d double cheese burger for bro, belden, jeremy & his roomy

18. Do people ever spell your name wrongly?
-always with the extra "g"

19. What's the last compliment you received?
-your lips are sexy, can i kiss you? (haha)

20. Which celeb are you eye candying?
-none

21. What's next on your wishlist?
-do well in finals

22. Which performer's concert would you want to watch?
-not into any stuffs like that..

23. What color are your nails?
-natural..

24. Date down a special day for you?
-17 oct (my bday!)

25. In just one word, describe yourself.
-myself (i am who i am)

26. LAST BOOK YOU READ
-chemistry lecture notes

27. LAST THING U DO BEFORE U GO TO SLEEP
-set alarm

28. LAST TIME U CRIED
-drama presentation

29. PRESENT PERSON U HATE
-nobody (love everybody)

30. PRESENT CRUSH
-trying to forget him..

LAST PERSON..
31. YOU TALKED TO EARLIER
-clare (my dear roomy)

32. WHO MADE YOU CRY
-myself..(forcefully for drama)

33. WHO MADE YOU SMILE
-puven..he made a silly spelling mistake when we chat

34. WHO SAID I LOVE U TO U
-dear bro..

35. HOWS YOUR LOVE LIFE
-single and available (haha)

SHE - 恋人未满

恋人未满

为什么只和你 能聊一整面 为什么才道别 就又想见面 在朋友里面 就是
你最特别 总让我觉得很亲很甜

为什么你在意 谁陪我逛衔 为什么你担心 谁对我放电 你说你对我 比别
人多以些 却又不说是多哪一些

友达以上恋人未满 甜蜜心房愉悦混乱 我们以后会变怎样 我迫不起待想知道
答案

再靠近一点点 就让你牵手 再勇敢一点点 我就跟你走 你还等什么 时间
已经不多 再下去只好只做朋友

再相近一点点 我就会点头 再冲动一点点 我就不闪躲 不过三个字 别犹
豫这么久 只要你说出口 你就能拥有我

为什么你寂寞 只想要我陪 为什么我难过 只肯让你安慰 我们心里面 明
明都有感觉 为什么不敢面对

我不相信 有多么感情却到不了爱情 那么贴心却进不了心底 你能不能快一点
决定 对我说我爱你

I'm currently into this song..
It's an old song by SHE..
To the guys out there..
If u like a girl, tell her..
Cause she maybe waiting for you..

Cont' : U will never know..

Pictures from glitter-graphics..
Quotes created myself based on own life experience..
Quotes dedicated to all the special people around me..

Moments after 12am

At 12AM...
Went out with Clare, Bel, Sook Harn & Serena..


First, we went to Huei Ming's (Sook Harn's roomy) house..
Because Sook Harn accidentally locked the door from outside..
So we need to take the extra key from Huei Ming..

Second, we to Mc Donald's..
Some of us had super late dinner..
Some had late supper..
Yau Kin joined us too..

Third, went to have a walk at a park..
Which is next to the cementry..
But none of us had 6th sense..
So nothing happened..sigh ..
Just had a very long walk around the park..

Fourth,went to Mc Donald's again..
This time to take away for some of our friends in UTP..


Reached UTP around 4.15AM..
It's now almost 5AM and I'm blogging..
Will be a piggy sleeping soon..




When a girl is quiet..
there are millions thoughts running through her mind..

Just For Fun :)

Sorry there are some spelling errors..
Comment on them..
Edited them myself.. :)


The quotes are taken from Leng Yein's FS profile..
Credits to her..
Totally admire her..

Happy Birthday!

Wanna wish myself Happy Birthday..

And also to my friends..

Yun Shen (16/10)
Roxanne (16/10)
Ilmy (16/10)
Lung Wei (18/10)

Happy Birthday!!

Thanks to my lovely roomy, Clare..
My dearest neighbours,
Bel, Huei Ming and Sook Harn..
And also to Serena...

For the choco cake,
I thought nobody remembered..

And thanks Clare for the kawaii hanger
and notebook..
Love the Bible verses inside.. :)

To my family..
To all my friends back in Kuching..
To all my friends in UTP..
And all my friends around the world..
Thanks for the birthday wishes..


~ Thanks ~

Will U ever Notice me?

Sometimes..
All I wish is to be noticed..
At least..
To be noticed...

也许应该简单活着，快乐痛苦不说。

Totally worn off!

Today is the most tiring day so far I had in UTP.
It is totally a craze and I felt like I want to scream out loud.
We did our last drama practice till around 1AM this morning.
I reached my room feeling totally exhausted, but thinking I still need to edit the drama slides.
I did the slides till 4AM and went straight to bed.

I woke up at 7AM since I had lecture starting at 8AM.
Blessed by God, I was glad at least I managed to sleep for 3 hours.
Despite all the slides editing and Chemistry lab flow charts.
Got myself prepared and went straight to lectures.

First lecture was Physics, I tried to keep myself awake.
But I keep "nodding" away.
Second lecture was Engineering Maths, it was supposed to be an active lecture.
But I was too sleepy, even did terribly in the quiz.
After the second lecture, there was an hour break.
That's when I had my breakfast.
The third lecture was Chemistry, the worst.
My eyes closed and gone wild beyond my control.
Even my head went wild that I can't control it from "nodding".
Maybe it was the effect after eating.

After Chemistry lecture,
I went back to my hostel since there will be 2 hours break before the next class.
I spent 1 hour sleeping.
I was so sleepy that I was not able to even open my eyes after my alarm rang.
But I forced myself up, prepared myself.
Carrying a handful of props for my drama presentation,
I walked to the cafe under the hot burning sun.
When I reached the cafe, I and Mark rushed to improvise the slides for our drama.
40 minutes before our next class.

After doing all the edits, we rushed to Block 19 for our Chemistry lab with all our props.
Then, we were told that we were supposed to have tutorial this week.
So we rushed to the tutorial room, which was near the cafe, but very far from the lab.
We were half way discussing our tutorial questions when we were again,
told that we were supposed to have lab today.
So again, we rushed to the lab.
This time, I walked while I complained all the way.
"I was walking up and down with the heavy props in my hand!!!"

When we reached the lab,
we were told that we will not be in time to complete the whole experiment,
since we had missed an hour of the lab.
So, the lab was postponed!
And, we had to walk back to the cafe again to prepare for our drama.
This time, I was no longer complaining, but yelling.
"Arghhh!!!"

Reached the cafe, prepared for drama.
At 4.50PM, we went to the lecture hall - where we'll have our drama.
After it was emptied, we went in and prepared since it will start at 5PM.
But after all the preparation, one actress was still missing.
Due to the unexpected circumstances,
our drama was delayed 30 minutes from the actual time.
Just before we were about to replace her role (she's the 1st to appear in the drama),
she popped out of nowhere and played her role.
The most difficult part was the crying part.
I did cried, but not to my expectations yet - or maybe my expectation was too high.
And my tears tasted so salty, cause I sweat the whole day walking up and down.



Here's a short view about our drama team!

Named : Al-Sanafer

From left to right

Raghda (Egypt),
Me (Swak),
Henna (Perak),
Mark (Swak),
Saddam (Swak),
Delwistiel (Swak),
Abdelrahman (Egypt)