Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The fears of my result

Just another short update cause I am really busy these few weeks before Chinese New Year. So we all got our results yesterday, it was out sometime after midnight, I think. I didn't wait for the result to be out, was not that anxious of my result. I slept early and woke up late because the monsoon season just officially started. Yesterday onwards, it had been raining non stop in Kuching. Few areas are already flooded. My house is considered on the highland, and no large drain nearby, so I enjoyed my time sleeping.

I woke up almost noon and first thing I did was to go Facebook. I knew I had to read all those status from my coursemates first to know what to expect. As I guessed, mostly complained about those few subjects which crushed our hopes. Some start accusing lecturers, the activities they took part in, the amount of games they played, the girlfriends wtf. After reading all those, I got a good laugh and decided to check on mine.

My result was as expected. Those I knew I did well and those I finished, or left blank and half heartedly leaving the exam hall. But with 20 credit hours I guess that was how I managed to use those strong subjects to help me with my weaker grades. The only subject I got A was my co-curriculum fml. But I didn't get any C this time. Hopefully my Vector Calculus was my first and last C. Mathematics and calculus is not really my thing. I can do maths but I am slow. I take longer time studying my geology core subjects than maths subjects but I always end up doing better in memorizing stuffs though I memorize till three quarter dead. Mostly I came out of the exam hall almost crying because I can't recall what I just memorized.

Most Science subjects need you to focus Physics-Chemistry or Biology-Chemistry with some or lots of maths. But it was such a pressure that I need to study all Physics-Biology-Chemistry-Maths. When it come to learning the Earth, practically the World, it's nothing near a piece of cake. It's really something I never expect, to learn what my Dad did any still after all those years he need to spend weeks in jungles, got his legs bitten by all kinds of insects leeches, he still give me all the support to pursue what I am doing right now.

Let's keep my result a little bit secret. I got over 3.0 but nothing reaching Dean's list yet. And I aim to reach there before I got for my internship which is 3 more semesters to go. I am not a bright student, far from a genius. But I will try my best to be there cause God always show me miracles and give me tonnes of surprises when I was at my weakest and when I lost hope.

So why am I surprised by this result of mine? There are a happenings which really de-motivate me last semester.

First: I was part of a big event in my Uni. I am sure some of you read on my post about Music Pursuit? The event was on Friday night, the rehearsals started on Tuesday the same week and my Probability & Statistics test was on Saturday morning. So I didn't manage to study at all cause I was having endless meeting, I even skipped a few lectures cause I was super exhausted. After the event ended almost at midnight, I went back and flipped my books right away without taking my shower fml. I studied till 4am I think, then I went to bed. I woke up super early to shower then continued studying until we need to go for the exam. I was all blur cause not only I need to study the concept, we need to memorize all the formulas, none given. That was when I screwed up cause I didn't manage to memorize the formula. So I got like 5/20 or lower wtf. I didn't do well in my final as well because I had 2 subjects in a day (both heavy). But I was grateful enough that I didn't collect another C in my record.

Second: The amazing moments when our Stratigraphy lecturer will suddenly yelled out, Quiz!! We had pop up quiz everyday, and the lecture is at 8AM everyday. He came late everyday, but we all came early fearing that we will miss the quiz if we came late but he never did came early fol. In every quiz, he gave us really short easy questions but don't be tricked cause the answers are difficult wtf. He will ask us to sit really really really far apart as if the hall is that big enough fhl and he wants the exact answer from the book, like every single vocab and grammar. You write "Abu, my friend, has a pen" instead or "My friend Abu has a pen" then you get zero@egg@telur. So most of our quizzes marks are 2/10 or max. 5/10. Then our final exam, I guess he expected us to memorize the whole book cause most of us got B+ at most (who got A tell me!!)

Third: My mission of saving the trees, my time and risking my life (for now my studies is my life fml). This post is getting interesting wtf. I have never used saving the trees as an excuse until last sem. I am a nature person but I am not that terrorist naturalist who thinks of saving trees every now and then, wear tree costume run around and so on. Okay back to the point. So one day I sold my printer cause it was occupying too much space, making me printing my field trip reports in the printing room. The printing room is far from civilization wtf no place selling paper nearby. So I had limited papers and after I printed all my reports only did I realized I got the title of the next page on the bottom of the previous page. Geddit? Alignment mistake. So I printed the titles on a piece of paper, cut (more of tear cause I only got ruler, no scissors which is why all of them are jaggered) the titles and pasted (thank God I got glue) them on top of each page. Then I liquid paper the titles at the bottom of the page. So you can imagine the mess of my report. Cut-paste-liquid papers on EVERY page. I ran to my lecturer's room and told him "I am sorry for the mess in the report, I had printing error and instead of reprinting everything I tried to save the trees". He just took my report and smiled. I said Thank you and ran out before he get to flip it and comment. Surprisingly, I got the highest marks in class.

Forth: For my co-curriculum, I took Modern Music. I am not a music person. Well I do listen but I don't play instruments. My guitar and piano lessons failed terribly like my swimming lesson fml. So I played the Trombone, yes me and the huge instrument. At first I had really difficult time holding it upright, my biceps are tiny. However I was determined to at least no because of the grades, but to learn something new. I had trouble blowing as well because of my braces, I can't get my mouth into that "M" position. When we all played together, I seemed like I am doing well. When I practice alone, I heard (myself) that I was playing well fml. Then it was exam time. We had to play harmony in a group and solo. Our harmony was well but when I played solo, I went out of tune. The lecturer need to ask my teammate playing the alto sexophone to accompany me. I did terribly but I had fun. And that subject turned out to be the only A I got.

Fifth: As I've posted before, I went back home (Kuching) for study week. My initial exam timetable was that my first paper to start on Tuesday. So I booked my flight back to KL on Sunday evening, thinking that I will have another day of rest before my first paper. To my surprise, I checked our exam timetable during the study week and a paper was changed to Monday! Thank God it was in the afternoon. So after reaching KL around 7pm, we (me and roomie) waited for 2 hours for our train to Batu Gajah. The KL-Batu Gajah journey took 2 hours plus. Reached Uni almost midnight. So I took out all my notes from study week and started revising, without showering and unpacking first. After 2 hours I slept. I woke up around 8am, shower, unpack and continue to study. That was beyond my expectation. 24 hours ago I was still in Kuching and now I am in the exam hall. It felt amazing I managed to stay wide awake the whole time.

That's how I am grateful with my results. Despite all those I still managed to get hold on to myself and strike for the best. Amazing adventure. After the exam, my adventure was also as amazing. I am going to start a new semester very soon. Trying to avoid joining any activities, enough being a spectator. I will try harder this time to reach my target. People strive for 4 flats, I strive to be in Dean's list enough can? Hehe :)

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